In my opinion, albeit humble, New York City is one of the greatest cities in the world. Yes, I know, I haven't visited them all, but New York is absolutely one of a kind. For the last 4 years, I have called it home. I have loved it and I have hated it. It has completely energized me at times and at others, brought on exhaustion that I didn't feel possible. Yes, it has been an adventure and it has been a good one.
To some degree, these have been the 4 most difficult years of my life. I have experienced some of the greatest joys I have ever known. I have let myself be vulnerable. I have let myself trust. I have actually let others in. And I learned a great deal about life because of that. But as with most things, there is an opposite. And I have experienced that opposite. I have experienced some of the greatest disappointments that I have ever known. I have felt the betrayal of dear friends. I have tasted the bitterness of rejection. I have been lonely, sad, and without hope. My faith has been shaken; my beliefs have been questioned. I have seen dark times.
And yet, I survived. And with each experience, I learned something about the world and something about myself. No, life is never easy.
But as time goes by, I wonder if this is where I am supposed to be. I wonder if New York holds something for me, that I haven't yet discovered. I wonder if future experiences here are just what I need. I wonder if I will continue to have good times along with the bad. I wonder if I will survive more heartache and disappointment or if bliss will find me instead. I guess these are just things that are naturally a part of life; but I wonder if I am to experience them here in the city. And in the same breath, I also wonder if I am just done. The answer? I don't know. Where in the world do you go after you have lived in New York City?
To some degree, these have been the 4 most difficult years of my life. I have experienced some of the greatest joys I have ever known. I have let myself be vulnerable. I have let myself trust. I have actually let others in. And I learned a great deal about life because of that. But as with most things, there is an opposite. And I have experienced that opposite. I have experienced some of the greatest disappointments that I have ever known. I have felt the betrayal of dear friends. I have tasted the bitterness of rejection. I have been lonely, sad, and without hope. My faith has been shaken; my beliefs have been questioned. I have seen dark times.
And yet, I survived. And with each experience, I learned something about the world and something about myself. No, life is never easy.
But as time goes by, I wonder if this is where I am supposed to be. I wonder if New York holds something for me, that I haven't yet discovered. I wonder if future experiences here are just what I need. I wonder if I will continue to have good times along with the bad. I wonder if I will survive more heartache and disappointment or if bliss will find me instead. I guess these are just things that are naturally a part of life; but I wonder if I am to experience them here in the city. And in the same breath, I also wonder if I am just done. The answer? I don't know. Where in the world do you go after you have lived in New York City?
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