The other day I forgot to make my lunch and therefore had to eat out. I decided to be healthy and chose to get a salad. It was decent and filled me up but literally an hour later I started to get a really bad headache. I couldn't figure out why because the salad was a nice combination of veggies and protein. Anyway, I decided to look up the nutritional information and realized that the salad had over 1000mg of sodium. Clearly it was the meat and the salad dressing that contributed to such an obscene amount of sodium but I found it to be so interesting that my body was reacting the way that it did. Our bodies want healthy, unprocessed foods. We just need to feed it to them.
Because I still believe salads to be a great source of raw veggies, I wanted to share my most favorite salad dressing recipe of the moment. Once you start making your own salad dressings, you will never go back. Promise. I snagged it from one of my heroes (Jamie Oliver) and it has become a staple in my home. Obviously, you can tweak it to suit your tastes or the type of salad that you are going to be serving, but it's a winner. The trick is to LIGHTLY dress your salad . I often add a little honey or raw agave nectar to sweeten it up. Enjoy!
Creamy French Dressing
Great with green salads and bitter leaves like endive or radicchio.
5 T white wine vinegar
4 T walnut oil
½ cup crème fraiche (I prefer just a spoonful or two)
While this song is totally catchy and Willow Smith has got some serious talent, this video completely disturbs me. Whatever happened to children being children?
Instead of the sweet innocence of youth, here we have a young girl and her entourage gyrating back and forth, literally crawling across the floor, and seductively moving across the screen--bedazzled and bejeweled from head to foot.
Not only does the video's content disturb me, but also the method behind the madness. I'm not saying that young children shouldn't perform or that they shouldn't develop talent. I'm not even saying that in some cases, with good, parental supervision and support, that they shouldn't be in the public eye. What I am questioning is the reason behind her parents sanctioning such an early entrance to the world of this type of stardom. She's 9 years old and she is being made up to look like she is 19. When I was 9 I was still playing Barbies and having neighborhood water fights. I don't get it and I don't like it. Let her be a little girl--a talented little girl--but a little girl still the same.
The other day I was in the supermarket and I was starving. (Bad. Idea.) Nature Valley granola bars were on sale for $2. I couldn't resist the sale so I picked up a box. Not until several days later when I actually went to eat one, did I read the label. It read "100% Natural". Big claim. I was curious to know what natural ingredients I was about to consume so I flipped the package over (first indication that it was not 100% natural). Here's what I found:
Whole Grain Oats
High Maltose Corn Syrup--WHAT???? 2nd ingredient???
Not only was this granola bar sickly sweet, but also, its packaging contained a bold faced lie. When I got a 100% on a test at school, that would mean that I got everything right. Not mostly right, but everything right. So when I read the claim of 100% natural, I assume that the entire contents of the package are indeed, natural. But like I said, in this case, it was not true. Sometimes a single attribute of a food product overshadows everything else and consumers who don't delve deeper by doing something as simple as reading the ingredients, unwittingly delude themselves into thinking that they are doing something good for their body.
What makes me upset is that these companies actually get away with making these false claims and that there are people out there who believe them. You may be aware of the recently applauded and progressive move by Ben & Jerry's--sparked by an invitation from the Center for the Science of Public Interest (CSPI) to remove their "all natural" claim. Ben & Jerry's complied. Go awesome! (For more information, read here.) But this is just a first step. Clearly, there are other, less progressive manufacturers out there that continue to make these false claims. My challenge to you is this:
1) READ THOSE LABELS,
2) REFUSE to support those products that make false claims, and
3) SPEAK OUT & CHALLENGE these companies to make changes.
Braceyourself! Yes, this is another food related post, but I stumbled across something tonight that I just have to share. I was on Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution page and found a shocking blog about school lunches. It's called "Fed Up With Lunch: the school lunch project". If you have children, want children, love children, or even think that they should exist, you should check this blog out.
Authored by an anonymous teacher named Mrs. Q., this blog and this teacher aim to reform school lunch. For the last year or so, she has been eating and documenting what is being served in the school lunch cafeteria. Menus range from shocking to eh, not so bad. But I admire this woman for taking a stand and for advocating for reform. Why must we reform school lunches? Take a look at these tasty meals:
As you go through the blog you will notice that some of the lunches aim to incorporate fruits and vegetables. They don't look SO bad. Bravo. But take a closer look. Notice how it is packaged. How wasteful. Each food item is served in a paper container sealed with plastic. And take a look at the food. Is it even real? What are these lunches actually made of? To me it looks processed, full of refined sugar, and cooked to the point where all nutritional value found within a normally healthy food has gone out the window.
I realize that there are budgetary constraints within our public school system. I realize that school cooks want to do their job well and provide their students with balanced meals but are limited by time, manpower, appropriate kitchen tools, and the lack of fresh ingredients. I realize that not every family can afford to bring their own lunch to school. My family was no exception. I remember being envious of friends who would brown bag it. They would bring the coveted Oreos, the bright bags of chips, and the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches on soft, white bread. (Looking back, those meal options might have actually been worse than what I was getting.) The point is, however, I understand the limitations that schools and students face when it comes to a nutritionally balanced meal.
That being said, what do we do? Your first reaction might be to do all that you can to ensure that you are packing your child's lunch. And that's a good step. As a concerned parent or guardian you have the right, and if I may be so bold, the responsibility to ensure that your child has nutrionally sound food available to him or her. What happens, you ask, when they go to school and the infamous lunch trading begins? This is where meals at home come into play. By creating a culture of healthful food in the home, kids will hopefully have a natural inclination to seek out that which is healthy and familiar. It's not going to happen all of the time. Kids are kids. But if they are accustomed to and enjoy "go foods" (foods that help them "go" and provide energy) as opposed to "slow foods" (foods that are heavy laden with sugars and that are engineered), the chances of them choosing better, increases.
So what now? You've resolved to continue or to improve upon healthy meals at home as well as your children's lunches that they take to school. Great! What else is there to do? PLENTY! I feel very strongly that while it is important to take care of our own, it is also equally important for us to figure out how we can help others...especially those that don't have the same types of resources. Reading this blog almost made me cry. Not because the writing was especially touching or profound, but rather because I thought of the hundreds and thousands of kids that need to eat school lunches and are basically being served frozen, packaged meals, day in and day out. Sure, they provide some burnable calories. Sure it meets the USDA's poor standard of a "balanced meal", but shouldn't food be so much more than meeting a govenmental standard and filling a calorie quota? Shouldn't it actually be providing nutrition, vitamins and minerals found in whole forms of food, sustainable energy? Doesn't every child have that right? YES! But in order for that to happen, people need to take a stand and speak up. Change doesn't happen unless we demand it and actually take the steps toward change.
You don't have to be a professional lobbyist. You don't have to have ties to the government (although that might help). All you have to do is spread the word and let your voice be heard. Write letters to the editor, comment on blogs that get a lot of traffic, share impactful Youtube videos on your Facebook page, twitter about a fantastic new site that you discovered, give your legislator a call, write your senator, reach out to the USDA, and most importantly, advocate in your local school district. Meet with the principal, the superintendent. Contact the Department of Education and let them know that you want change. Again, nothing will happen without us taking action. So get fed up and make a change!
For those of you that know me, you'll know that my quest for a workable and healthy diet has had it's ups and downs and also that I've been a little obsessed with it. (Apologies if you tire of me talking of how important it is to eat whole & unprocessed foods.) I have experimented, for varying amounts of times, with diets that were strictly organic, only local, strictly vegetarian, mostly vegetarian, low carb, unprocessed & whole foods, and even some raw & living foods. While I can't say that I am the best at sticking to any one type of diet, what I can say is that I have gleaned something valuable from each way of life. I can also say, without the least bit of hesitation, that when you are on your own quest to improve your health and diet, you need to figure out what works best for you. In my opinion that comes through education, experimentation, evaluation, modification, and finding motivation. (Doesn't all change require that type of a pattern?) It also takes time, which many of us don't claim to have. But if our health is at stake, isn't it worth it to spend a little more time on something that can bring us so many benefits now AND in the future?
Anyway, one thing that I find myself coming back to when I need a little burst of motivation is a documentary called Food Matters. My first exposure to this film was when I won this DVD at a lecture about permaculture that my friend Anthony Anderson (aka the Raw Model) spoke at. I'll have to post the story of how we met some time. It's a little embarrassing but it makes me laugh and I can't tell you how grateful I am that we did meet. He has been such a source of inspiration to me...so much so, that I am looking at the raw diet again. I don't see myself (at this point) doing a completely raw diet. But rather, I want to see how much I can fully adopt. Maybe it will end up being a "raw before dinner" type of a deal. I don't know. But I really do believe in the power of whole, natural foods and think that we are doing ourselves and our families a disservice if we turn a deaf ear to this whole school of thought.
For your viewing pleasure and in an effort to persuade you to rent the movie, I've included the trailer. The video was compelling and presented arguments that can't intelligently be disputed. So here's to your health! Enjoy!
Thank goodness for music and for the modern day technologies that allow us to record it. For the last hour I have been listening to the same two songs over and over again: My Yellow Ginger Lei and Ke Kali Nei Au (the Hawaiian Wedding song). Yes, sometimes I just want to hear the songs of the islands, but more often than not, I just want to hear my dad. That is the case tonight. I just wanted to hear my dad’s beautiful voice sing the music that he loved. Though the voices of the Aloha Islanders blend beautifully, I can still hear him over the others…a discovery that I revel in every single time.
Now, I’m not writing for sympathy or because I have a desire for others to drown in my sorrow with me. I just needed another way to get it all out. I needed something more than an hour’s worth of music to help me get through the evening.
It’s been ten years, two months and six days since I last saw him; ten years, two months and five days since I last heard his voice over the phone. It’s hard to believe that much time has actually passed and yet I remember the day he died just like it was yesterday. The memory of it continues to stop me in my tracks as I remember the details of it all. I miss him. I will always miss him. But there are days that I miss him more than others. I suppose today is just one of those days. I suppose that all of us, every now and again, just need a good cry.
Food has become my new passion. It's been a long time in the making, but over the last year or so, I just can't get enough. If I could, I would quit life as I know it and run away to culinary school. I daydream of making it big, buying a home with an amazing kitchen, and spending all my days creating culinary masterpieces. I envy those who can make their dreams of food creation a reality. Unfortunately, I'm not in a position where I can do that. My days are consumed with the normal routines of life. However, it doesn't mean that I'm not going to try to fit in as much as I can.
A few weeks ago, I made a new goal to try at least two new recipes a week. So far so good. It's been fun to get creative in my kitchen--my very, very small kitchen. Despite the limitations of a minuscule workspace, here are a few of my most recent successes...
Update: I have included a few of the links to the recipes that I used. Keep in mind that I hardly ever follow the recipe. I always make modifications along the way. For example, with the Tiramisu, I used Pero instead of coffee and omitted the wine. For the banana cream pie, I mashed up bananas and put it into the pudding mix. Should I make this again, I would strain the pudding mixture to preserve the integrity of the texture. etc. etc.
So I was at the gym and looked up and two machines in front of me I saw someone that looked really familiar. Then he smiled at me and I realized that I had seen that smile before. And then I realized that it was Peter (Tim DeKay) from White Collar!!!!
Of course I couldn't restrain my smile at this point so it turned into what I can only imagine, a goofy grin. He then started to really smile and gave me a slight nod. I think he realized that I had recognized him. I hope it made him feel good that I turned a giddy school girl. We didn't talk to each other but floated around the same weights area for about twenty minutes and my heart felt warm and fuzzy. :)
1. CW—One of my closest friends, Christian Ward, has been in the city for a summer internship with Amex. We've been friends since high school (He claims we were high school sweethearts. I don't seem to remember it that way.) and became really close when we both moved to NYC the same week. Through the years we've stayed in touch (he has since moved back to Utah). Right now I am basically having the best time of my life. I haven’t had so much fun or laughed so hard in a really long time. I am so glad that he is here. I am going to bawl my eyes out when he leaves. But CW is definitely one of my favorite things right now.
2. AC—my next favorite is a blessed, little thing called Air Conditioning. I don’t know how anyone in this city can survive without it. There is nothing better then stepping out of a stifling heat into a blast of cool air.
3. Eclipse—I feel like a bad fan, but despite the fact that I have only seen Eclipse once (opening night of course), I still feel perfectly justified in adding this to my favorite things list. I loved the movie. I clapped and giggled and swooned with the rest of them. Best of the three so far. And RP? Stunning!
4. Lady Antebellum—two of my music friends (and by music friends I mean people who recommend music to me) both gave me the thumbs up for Lady Antebellum. It’s a country group that has successfully crossed over into the pop pool. Personally, I don’t care what pool they reside in. All I know is that I love it.
5. The Color Blue—No, it’s not a sequel to The Color Purple but rather just the color. For some reason, I am obsessed with the color blue. I find myself mostly buying blue things right now—especially clothing. Oh well.
6. Glee—like a lot of popular trends that come and go, I tried to resist this one. I really tried. But then I randomly saw Mr. Shuester and his darling curls (Matthew Morrison) perform and I was hooked. How could I not? Guys that can sing and play some sort of instrument are just dreamy. Can’t wait for the season to start up once again.
7. Cooking—still an obsession that I love to watch, research, and do. I think it always will be.
8. Pride & Prejudice—Confession: I have never read Pride & Prejudice. Yes, I am hanging my head in shame. BUT we're reading it for book club and I am loving it. I don’t know if it’s because I know the story so well or if my love for Mr. Darcy (the BBC version of Mr. Darcy) transcends all time and place, but this book is so clever. I love getting lost in its pages and the fact that I am still hanging on every word, wondering what will happen next.
Notice the print at the bottom. It says IBM--Ideal Breeding Material. :)
9. Watermelon—I am constantly craving fresh watermelon. Thank goodness it’s in season.
10. My Mac—I’m still in love with my laptop. The more I learn about its functionality, the more I’m in love with it.
Hearing Jamie Oliver talk about this stuff makes makes me so excited. It motivates me to make changes in my life and it also makes me want to grow this idea as far and as wide as possible. Take a look. You won't be sorry...and if you are....WHO ARE YOU????
Tonight after I finished with the gym I entered my building, closely followed by another tenant. He was young, probably in his early twenties, and upon seeing me his face lit up as if he had just had the most brilliant idea pop into his head. I fumbled around for my keys but wasn't quick enough to prevent the show.
"Have you heard of the Incredible Hulk?" he said with a smile.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"Have you heard of the Incredible Hulk?" he repeated.
"The Incredible Hulk? Yes."
He then proceeded to forcefully yank the door open without the use of the front entrance key. The door popped open with a loud click. Clearly it wasn't made to do that. He seemed proud of his latest feat and was surprised, I'm sure, by my response.
"You shouldn't do that. That breaks the door. That's why the super won't fix this place up. It's because people keep breaking things."
He was silent as I continued on. He looked at me with wide, vulnerable eyes as I proceeded to kindly "berate" him for damaging property and essentially contributing to the dilapidated state of the building. I think he was dumbfounded, to tell you the truth. His plan to wow me or come to my rescue completely backfired. When I could see that he was finally starting to make the connection between his actions and the effect that it has on the rest of us living here, I started to ease up on him. I ended the conversation civilly and then casually and got off the elevator.
Who knows if my calling him out will have a lasting effect on him. I hope it does. Or it may just mean that there is yet another person that I should avoid in this crappy building, but oh well. I'm glad that I said something. Hopefully the next time he wants to make an impression on a girl he won't try to use vandalism as a means to do so. Because...that don't impress me much.
Yes, I know that Jamie Oliver is not the first chef to use fresh, whole foods. He is not the first to educate and to give back to the community. He is not the first to use his celebrity status to move an idea forward. And he is not the first to make monumental, positive changes happen. But I’ll tell you what…Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution is inspiring and it is making a difference. And it is happening because one person decided that he cared enough to use his resources, his know-how, and his status to do something. And for that, I admire him tremendously.
Recently, I have been reading Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the All-American Meal by Eric Schlosser. It is a frightening account of the “evolution” of the American diet and business of fast food. It details everything from marketing strategies targeting children, the horrors of feeding lots & slaughtering houses, the injustices found within the fast food system including poor wage, dangerous working conditions, lack of training & benefits, to the exploitation and eventual demise of hardworking and honest cattleman and farmers all for the benefit of the fast food giants that have become more popular than about any other thing that you could possibly think of.
What I love about Jamie Oliver or people like Eric Schlosser, Michael Pollan, or Wendell Berry is that they appreciate and understand the importance of our relationship with food, with the earth, and with our communities. They understand that health and well-being comes from a holistic and natural approach and that it is vital to understand where we are, where we have been, and where we are headed if we continue down the same path. But not only do they strive to understand, they strive to educate and involve others to promote positive and lasting change. They understand that revolutions such as these do not happen if one is silent, but rather, they happen when one person takes a stand and says, “No more.”
Change is difficult and slow-moving sometimes. But I find comfort in the fact that there are others out there who espouse to the same beliefs and actually motivate me to make those changes in my own life and to then look outward in order to be of help to someone else.
There will certainly be more posts on this subject as I have rediscovered my interest in this. But for now, check out Jamie Oliver’s show and let the beginnings of revolution stir within.
3. Combine with 23rd Street & 6th Avenue, New York, NY (heading East).
4. Combine with Bobby Flay + wife (optional)
5. Mix in a completely discombobulated, blushing, having-trouble-breathing, so close you could reach out and touch him, crushing fan (me).
THE RESULT:
crushing, happy, smiling girl!
(Make sure to watch the video above from :15 to :25. This is how I felt when Bobby crossed my path.)
P.S. While I do have a huge crush on Mr. Flay, I'm not as crazy as I might seem right now. Promise! (Don't worry, Bobby. I won't be stalking you or your lovely wife.)
As a child I grew up on the both the game and movie Clue. We loved the game and spent hours fighting and figuring out "who dunnit" and yes, sometimes there were casualties other than Mr. Peabody as a result of those ever-changing mysteries. Still the same, we loved the game and as such, we loved the movie as well. Many, many classic lines can be pulled from its archives but one that finds its way into my brain more often than you can find Obama addressing the nation on public television, was uttered by the "prudent" Mrs. White played by Madeline Kahn:
Now very recently, I found myself living this expression a little more often than I'm accustomed to. These were moments when I could actually feel the rage swirling within me, churning in my gut and surging upwards towards my face and through my eyeballs.
What caused these imaginary but all too real flames to ignite the sides of my face? Well, it was the MTA, of course.
Four times--count 'em--FOUR times within the last few weeks, I have been kicked off the train and forced to seek other modes of transportation. At the height of morning rush hour or after a long day's work, a signal malfunction, a sick passenger, or a fire on the tracks have all interfered with my travel.
Four Reasons Why I Rage:
1. Other modes of transportation: Let me clarify, other modes of transportation means walking or finding a bus or making your way across town to take another functioning train. But mostly it means that you just have to walk. If you have the money and the luck, you could also hail a cab. The problem here, however, is that once you empty out an entire train load of passengers, every cab--yellow or otherwise--is immediately snatched up. So not only are you terribly late for work and left in a most inconvenient spot, but also you are fighting hundreds of other passengers for that same overpriced ride.
2. Sick passengers: I get the reason for caution when there is a malfunctioning train signal. But I do NOT understand why the MTA insists on taking a train out of service when there is ONE sick passenger. Wouldn't it make more sense to simply remove the passenger from the train, take them to safe and secure location, and assign a train personnel to stay with them until help arrives? For the life of me, I cannot understand why they have to empty the entire train so that the passenger can be attended to more quickly. You would think that it would be easier for an emergency response team to navigate an empty platform as opposed to one that is full of disgruntled passengers.
3. Out of service buses: When a train is pulled out of service they sometimes set up shuttle buses as an alternative. On one of these most recent episodes, the shuttle bus announcement was made. Obediently, passengers filed out of the subway station and headed in both directions to find the nearest bus stop to wait in the rain. The buses came, but not like you would expect. Empty Bus #1: Out of Service. Empty Bus #2: Out of Service. Empty Bus #3: Out of Service. Empty Bus #4: Out of Service. Empty Bus #5: Out of Service. Jam-Packed Bus #6: too full to let any new passengers on. Empty Bus #7: Out of Service. I kid you not, out of 12 buses that passed us, only three stopped for passengers. Two of them were too full to really allow anyone on.
4. Twice in one day: On one lucky day, this happened to me on the way to work and on my travels home. Yeah, I was not a happy commuter.
Yes there are positives to the MTA. Sure I no longer have to look for parking. Sure traveling here is much more inexpensive than owning my own car. Sure I can read or close my eyes or just zone out if I want in the middle of my travels. Sure its the greener way. But sometimes MTA hell makes me want pack my bags and flee to a car friendly part of the world.
There are many obvious reasons as to why I love New York. The people, the culture, the energy, the fast paced way of life, the style, and the stars. But one of the things that I have really come to love and appreciate are the free things that are being handed out left and right. ALL. THE. TIME!
Given that New York City is one of the most influential hubs for trend setting in the world, it behooves companies of all walks of life to promote their product and their ideas in a big way in the big apple.
My favorites within the last month:
--Burger (Goburger.com) --Turkey burger & fries (Goburger.com) --Plastic, spill proof coffee mug (Starbucks) --Stainless steel or aluminum water bottle (Claritin)
One of the things that interests me about blogging is the fact that you can share your random, everyday opinions with people you know and love as well as with those with whom you have no other connection save through this vast cyberspace we call the internets (yes, that was an intentional mistype). There’s something strangely exciting about posting your position for all the world to see and then having random strangers somehow find your blog. What’s even better is when these random strangers find something in your blog that elicits such a strong reaction that they feel compelled to make a comment—good or bad.
Now I don’t mind it when people disagree with what I have posted. I’m always open to other points of view. As long as there is a certain level of respect on both sides, I’m fine. Yes, even if we agree to disagree. What I find to be irritating, however, is when comments miss the boat entirely and then they hide behind the mask of anonymity.
This morning someone responded to my “why????” post—a brief and perhaps snarky commentary on people’s immodesty at the gym. Here is the comment:
“This sentiment is unjustified. You are wrong. Get over yourself. We have every right to shower at our gym.”
Really?
Now, if you will refer to the post in question, you’ll notice that I said NOTHING about gym-goers not showering. By all means, PLEASE shower. You’re doing the rest of us a favor, and quite frankly, you might as well take advantage of this membership perk. But, if the reader will kindly re-read the post--perhaps more carefully this time--he/she will notice that I was commenting on the amount of flesh and indiscreetness shown at the gym, not about the act of showering itself.
So despite the unsigned chiding, I stand by my original post and will not “get over myself”. Shower at the gym. Enjoy the convenience that it brings. But for heaven’s sake, cover it up. Allow me to reiterate: No one wants to see you or your girls at any age or any stage. You may think you have it, but you probably don’t. And even if you did, what makes you think that the rest of us want to see it? There is a way to shower at the gym without running around the locker room naked. I know, I know, it may be difficult to imagine, but believe me, it is possible. Check out the rest of the people around you…the ones with towels carefully tied around them. They’ll help you figure it out.
This morning as I was walking to the train station I passed a Chinese fast food place, one of those tacky souvenier shops, and then another Chinese fast food place--all within 3 blocks. The gift shop was named "Lucky Gift Hunting". I don't quite remember what the names of the fast food joints were but other similar spots came to mind--Best Chinese Food, Happy Family Chinese Restaurant, All Happy Restaurant--just to name a few. I started to think about how the owners actually came up with the names and then it hit me...
Search engines!
"I want to find a good luck gift."
SEARCH: luck, gift = Lucky Gift Hunting
"I want to go to the best Chinese place in the city."
SEARCH: best, Chinese = Best Chinese Food
"I'm in the mood for only moderately good Chinese."
SEARCH: not very good, Chinese = OK Chinese Food
"My family is going through some hard times, what will make everyone happy?"
SEARCH: happy, family = Happy Family Chinese Restaurant
"I want to meet new people, make some good friends."
SEARCH: good, friend = Good Friend Restaurant
It all makes sense now...it wasn't just a bunch of happy words thrown together. It was a carefully designed marketing scheme. Who knew?
The other day I was walking around during lunch. I saw a man with a walking stick at the corner. He turned his head from side to side and said, "Can someone help me?" Of course I walked up to him and asked him if I could help him cross the street. He grabbed my arm and we started to cross.
"Thank you so much," he said.
"No problem."
"What do you do?" he asked.
"I'm a social worker."
"Oh. What color of coat are you wearing?"
Odd...."Purple."
"What color of panties?"
"Yeah, ok. Here you go...."
Thankfully, we had safely arrived at the other corner just as he had asked the question. Feeling like I did my duty and that he was safely delivered, I was able to return to my errand-running in good conscience; and he was able to, I'm sure, continue on his merry way...perhaps harassing other do-gooders in similar fashion.
Why must you parade around that way? No one wants to see it and you don't look that great anyway. Please be more discrete. Use a towel. Cover up. Turn around. I don't care. Just put it away. Please!!! What ever happened to modesty?
There's something wrong with the world when kindness and chivalrous behavior take me by surprise. Tonight I went out with a friend whose company I really enjoy. As always, we had a great time, stimulating conversation, and some fabulous food. Throughout the evening he continuously doled out little surprises like helping me with my coat, complimenting me on seemingly unnoticeable things, helping me to step over a slushy puddle mess by taking my hand. I loved it. My heart warmed with each instance. It was not uncommon for him to do this.
So the question is, why is it that some men deem it their privileged role to be gentlemanly, while others in their same age bracket reserve those simple gestures for only those in whom they are interested. Kindness is never wasted, nor does it cause true affection to depreciate and yet there are still those who refrain from these actions for fear that they are sending the wrong message. I would think that kindness spread universally would actually work to their favor rather than the opposite. What woman, attached to a particular man or not, does not appreciate being a recipient or observer of that type of behavior? I would venture to say that unless he was a greasy stalker, non-discriminatory, basic chivalry always garners a man extra points.
Now there are many men who are kind, many who naturally treat women this way. They do exist. I guess I just find it strange that far too often, I am surprised by these occurrences. Perhaps it says something about me? Maybe I don't notice? Maybe I don't give men the opportunity to show these kindnesses? Perhaps there isn't something wrong with the world, but rather, something wrong with me? It's something to think about, I suppose.
This morning as I was hurrying to catch the train, I was forced to slow down as a woman and her dog darted in front of me. She had just stooped down to pick up his poo that he had deposited onto the sidewalk and was walking over to the garbage can...or so I thought. Nope. After she had picked it up, she threw it on the side of the road, napkin and all.
"Are you kidding me?" I uttered under my breath, wondering if I should have said it louder so that she would have heard me. But visions of her chasing me, poo in hand and yelling in a language I didn't understand changed my mind...just for today.
As a gift, here is a better dog poo story that makes me laugh every time I watch it.
Ah, REM, that blessed part of sleep where the imagination runs wild, the stage associated with processing emotions, retaining memories, and relieving (or reliving) stress.Depending upon your personal cycle, one will usually experience three to five episodes of Dream Sleep (REM) each night.Strange that we don’t remember them all.
I’m a dreamer and by that I don’t mean that I am a “dream the impossible dream” type of girl…although I do tend to fantasize about the impossible more often than I care to admit.What I mean by dreamer is that I usually remember at least one or two of my dreams every night.It baffles me that others aren’t the same way.Talk about missing out!Although I have had my share of terrifyingly upsetting dreams, I also have my share of fun, exciting, and hopeful ones as well.
Last night’s fit into that latter category.
Sparing you the details of a somewhat confusing dream, what I remember most is that I “had” a baby.Don’t remember giving birth or the other fun steps leading up to that blessed event but I had one still the same.The other wrap-me-in-blankets-of-love moment was when I happened to remember who the father was and how excited and pleased we were with our masterpiece of a creation.(For the record, I cannot even begin to imagine the connection two people must feel after that experience.I’m sure it is amazing!)
Needless to say, I woke up with somewhat of a crush on the father of my baby and find myself wishing I was still asleep.But more than that it reminded me of two things:
1. I really do want children.Lately I’ve been realizing how much work it takes to be a parent…a good parent, at that.It must be physically and emotionally exhausting.Making sure that they are cared for, fed, clothed, taught the things that they need to know to thrive, to excel, to become spiritually sound.It must be heart-wrenching to watch your child struggle in life, to see them friendless, teased, to watch how life can sometimes be so disappointing and unfair.It’s a lot of pressure and I’ve seen what happens when parents fail to fully perform.But despite it all, there is something within in me that absolutely wants children and is up to the challenge.I’m sure the blessings of parenthood far outweigh every sleepless night, every neglected task, every changed schedule, every sacrifice.That being said…
2. I want a good husband.Now this seems obvious to most.Everyone wants a good companion, an equal and loving partner.But I want someone who is GOOD...really GOOD.I’ve always been a sucker for nice guys.I am drawn to men who have good hearts and who strive to do what is right no matter what.Unfortunately, for whatever reason, life has dealt me a hand where these guys don’t typically reciprocate my feelings…especially as of late.As a result, questions like “does it really matter” have taken up residence in my brain and I have faltered a bit in my resolve.However, last night’s “husband” is a very good man.One of the best I am acquainted with—of that I am sure. Sadly, we don’t really spend much time together, nor have we ever, really.I’m not even sure if we are compatible.But what I know is that he has the qualities of a good man, the qualities of a good husband.I’m sure that this crush will fade soon, but for now, he is the face of my personal course corrector—something that I really needed…when I needed it the most.
Oh those poor souls who can’t remember their dream sleep.Aside from the physical benefits of completing a full sleep cycle, it’s clear that dreams can serve more than one purpose…for me anyway…
And to my dream husband...thanks, babe. :) (I'm really not as crazy as I may appear right now.)
